The ENTIRE Mean Creek Script
by BatOutOfHell666
Summary: The entire Mean Creek script, right here on FanFiction.


preHey! What do you think

you're doing?!

\- You're a punk, Sam!

\- Get off.

I ought to kill you!

You fucking dickhead!

\- I told you to never touch my camera!

\- Stop!

Didn't I?! Fucker! You little wimp!

Bitch! Pussy! I told you!

I ought to fucking kill you!

And I will kill you, you little punk,

if I ever catch you fucking

with my camera again.

\- He's so gonna cry.

\- Step on him!

\- Get out of my way!

\- Relax, man.

Are you OK?

You ever stare at the ceiling

till it started looking kind of funny?

Like it was breathing.

Like it was saying something.

Like it was saying,

"Rocky,

you gotta do something

about what's been going on."

Something's gotta happen, Sam.

Something's gotta give.

We can call the police.

Police wouldn't do jack.

I wish I was bigger.

I'm bigger.

Not to mention the fact

that I'm smarter.

If you do something,

he'll just get you.

Did you ever used to get me

when we used to play hide-and-seek?

\- No.

\- He wouldn't have any better luck.

Wanna know my secret hiding spot?

The roof.

The disappearing man.

Exactly.

So high. Oh, my God.

Rocky's thinking about

doing something to George.

I don't get how the teachers

can just let him get away with that.

Teachers don't care.

They have him in detention

for minutes for a week.

Something's gotta give.

If you could snap your fingers

right now,

and he would drop dead in his tracks,

would you do it?

Are we still on for Saturday?

Yeah, of course.

So, what are we gonna do?

I'll figure something out,

and I'll surprise you.

Hey, you know that fat kid, George,

who they keep holding back

from graduating middle school?

Yeah, I hate that guy.

He beat up Sam.

No.

Hey, you know

when we were at Rollins,

that crazy kid

chased me across the field

and cracked my head

open with a bat.

\- Finally, an explanation.

\- Yeah, anyway...

\- He's a real pig.

\- I say we smoke that ham.

Yeah? Make some

ham sandwiches?

Pork chop-ify him.

Spam-icize him.

\- Link sausage-ize him!

\- Squeal, piggy! Squeal!

No, screw that guy.

You'd really like to do that,

wouldn't you, Clyde?

\- You're projecting, Marty.

\- Projecting?

That's when you say something

that someone else...

You say that they want to do, when

you're the one who wants to do it.

No, no, no. That's good.

That's good.

Hold up, Rocky. Back up.

I got something for you.

Just a little...

\- Oh, you son of a bitch!

\- I was just projecting.

Oh, you asshole!

Later.

Wait up, man!

Let's go get some ice cream.

OK, Dave.

Hey!

Hey!

\- Where were you guys?

\- Get beat up today?

See any new scars?

\- Got any more gum?

\- I'm chewing the whole pack.

Why, you want some?

Tasty.

OK,

Jennifer Lopez or the girl

who sits behind you in school?

J. Lo.

OK, I think I got one.

Tie him to a tree,

pour some honey on his face,

and leave him there

all day and night.

\- Why?

\- It's for the bugs,

so they'd get on him

and bite him.

\- No, we can't do that.

\- Why not?

Well, what if a bear came?

Shut up.

You know,

if we hurt him,

we'd be just as bad as him.

So we need to hurt him

without really hurting him.

I mean, if you could think

of something like that, then...

Then what?

I don't know.

All right, Heather Locklear

or Shannen Doherty?

Don't know who

Heather Locklear is.

You don't...? Dude!

So, what do you say?

I think it's a totally wild plan.

It's also the only plan

my brother would agree to.

He's just a little fucking

Gandhi, isn't he?

Like a fucking white

Martin Luther King.

All we need now is a boat.

Hey, my neighbor's got a boat

in her back yard that she never uses.

\- Does that mean you're in?

\- Do you actually think he'll go for it?

Oh, please. George'll get a hard-on

as soon as he picks up the phone.

Rock will throw on some of

that "sweet boy" charm of his.

Kid's desperate. Stupid.

It's human nature.

All I know is, is I'm getting a hard-on

just thinking about it.

Your mom don't need

the car Saturday, does she?

The only thing my mom needs

on Saturdays is Valium.

What do you think, Clyde?

Do we want to give Georgie Porgie a

little taste of his own medicine? Huh?

Be some good, clean fun,

don't you think?

Yeah, he deserves it, doesn't he?

If there's one thing

that can't be argued,

it's that that fat freak deserves

whatever he's got coming to him.

Dude, what'd I tell you?

You don't smoke herb.

Yeah, so get it out of my face.

Faggot.

Clyde-o,

I'm just fucking with you.

You're not a faggot, all right?

OK?

Fist bump?

Fist bump?

OK, zero kilter.

Besides, I like your dads, Clyde.

I never knew any homosexual men

personally until I met them.

They're not so bad.

Don't you think so, Rocky?

Clyde, don't worry about Marty.

It's just B.S.

OK? Come on. It's B.S.

OK? It's B.S.! B.S.! Come on!

OK?

Hello? George?

Hey, hey. This is Rocky Maris,

Sam's older brother.

Yeah. I got your number

off the call list.

Is that OK? Great.

Well, what I wanted to call

you about was...

Is that I'm inviting you to...

To a party for Sam.

Now, I know that you two have

been having some trouble lately.

But you know what?

He's always talking about

how cool you are.

And it would really mean a lot

to him if you could come.

It's his birthday.

It's on Saturday at noon.

We can pick you up if you'd like.

We're going boating.

We're going on a boating trip.

You like boating?

Yeah, awesome.

So the only thing

that I can really ask you to do,

is not tell too many people.

Because we didn't really invite

a lot of people, and...

And, you know, everyone knows

everybody in this town.

And you tell your parents,

parents will tell other parents,

and those parents will tell their kids.

And pretty soon everyone

who didn't get invited

will be sitting at home, crying.

We don't want that, do we?

There you go.

So do you want me to pick you up

at noon? Awesome!

So I will see you at noon, George.

Awesome. Have a great day. Bye.

\- Oh, God.

\- What did he say?

He said he would love to go.

He'd love to go.

Oh, I'd love to go.

I'd love to... If you could just...

I'd love, love, love to go.

Oh, I'd love to go! Come here.

\- Say "uncle."

\- Uncle.

\- Uncle who?

\- Uncle Martini!

Kiss my ass, Mr. Shaham.

Kiss my ass, Mr. Estes.

Kiss my ass, Ms. Johnson.

Kiss my ass, Mr. Rosenthal.

Shit.

Hey! What's up with my shooter,

twerp face.

Target practice.

It's a.m. In the morning

for chrissakes.

Most people are doing cartwheels

by Kile.

Aren't you supposed to be

in school?

Fuck school.

I don't see you in school.

And besides, you're not Dad.

Come here.

Come here!

Yeah, you're right, I'm not Dad.

Dad didn't yank as hard as I do.

I don't really want to hear about Dad,

you understand?

\- You understand?

\- Yes.

Now, hand me my gun.

Look, stupid.

You ever take this

without my permission again,

I guarantee it, you'll be sorry.

\- You understand?

\- Yeah.

\- You get it?

\- Yes.

Kiss my ass, Kile.

Things to say to Sam

on our date.

One.

So...

Sam, it's a beautiful day, isn't it?

Two.

Are you happy

or sad

that we're leaving

Rollins next year?

Three.

So, what's your father do

for a living again?

Oh, he has a car-stereo company.

Do you believe in God?

That's a weird question.

So, what's it like being a male?

OK, stupid question.

My name is George.

This is the inside of my mind.

This is my mother.

My mom works out every day.

And this is my street.

This is the street I live on.

\- What are we doing?

\- You're gonna like this.

Isn't that George Tooney?

Yeah, he's coming

to the river with us.

\- Why?

\- Sammy, don't you tell

your girlfriend nothing?

\- What's he talking about, Sam?

\- You should've told her, Sam.

All right, everyone.

He's coming. Be nice to him.

Millie, it's supposed to be part

of the surprise. We...

Happy birthday, Sammy.

Hi, George.

Glad you could make it.

You know everybody?

\- Yeah, sure. Hey, everybody.

\- Hey.

\- What's happening, George?

\- Hey, Georgie.

\- Hi, George.

\- Hey, Millie.

We ready?

\- What are you doing?

\- Making a documentary.

\- Of what?

\- Of things.

Like Sam opening his present.

Go ahead and open it.

Yeah, Sam, go ahead and open it.

You already opened

all your other presents at home.

Stream Machine's top of the line.

I have one at home,

so we can have a war sometime.

\- Isn't it excellent?

\- Oh, yeah, thank you, George.

You must've blown your whole

allowance on that thing, huh, George?

How much you bagging

a week now, bucks?

It's very sweet of you, George.

I got it at Funco.

\- You can return it if you want.

\- Oh, no, it's perfect.

Well...

...it's a beautiful day

for a boat trip with some buddies.

Hey, Marty?

My mom made me sign

one of those contracts.

It's just, like... You know, I'm not

allowed to get in a car with a driver

\- who's been drinking.

\- Oh, it's cool.

My mom gave me permission

to drink and drive.

\- You don't have to worry about it.

\- Your mom must be pretty stupid

to give you permission

to drive inebriated.

No, you're right, George.

My mom is pretty stupid.

In fact, she's got one of those

learning-disability things.

Must be a bad LD.

I have an LD,

but I should know you're

not supposed to drive drunk.

I see stuff all backwards and shit.

Like, instead of seeing "stop"

on a stop sign,

I see "pots."

My doctor says it's

a genetic variation,

like for evolution.

So maybe I'm a superior being.

The future of the race.

Like, if aliens came down

and they had a...

A language,

a super-advanced language,

that said you had to read

this way to that way,

instead of that way

to this way.

Shit.

Yo, kidlings.

What are you guys doing here?

Eating mini beef tacos.

Finest mini beef tacos

in the world here.

Yummy.

What, did you steal

Mom's car again?

\- Why do you care?

\- I don't give a fuck.

Who's the minors?

It's just my brother

and some of his friends.

What are the paddles for?

We're going cow spanking.

Cow spanking, what's that?

It's like cow tipping,

only we spank.

Really.

Come on, let's just get the smokes

and get out of here.

Camels.

While you boys are out

cow spanking,

Kile and I are gonna go

pussy hunting.

\- Good for you, Jasper.

\- Hey, don't get sassy with my boy.

You ever been pussy hunting?

No, I didn't think so.

You know how I knew?

Because you gotta have some bait

to catch one.

That's great.

Grow up, Jasper.

Let's go, Marty.

Jesus, Jasper.

Why do you have to...?

Dumb fucks.

Why do you have

to act so retarded?

Have fun cow spanking, boys.

\- Oh, man. That was awesome.

\- You see that shit?

\- So whose road is this?

\- It's just a road.

Hey, you guys ever hear about

when Rocky and I

were kicking it out here?

We got some poison oak

on our hands.

This is a disgusting story.

Anyway, so we were out here,

and we got some poison oak

on our hands.

With all the beers we were drinking,

well, naturally,

we had to take a piss.

Now, I don't know

if you're hip, Millie,

but when a guy pisses,

he has to hold his pisser

in his hands.

\- Like so:

\- Thanks, Marty.

No, wait, I'm not finished yet.

Next morning when we woke up,

we both had totally chapped,

rash-y nuts.

Hey, lucky you didn't run out

of toilet paper,

have to wipe your butt

with your hand.

Ouch, ouch!

I just got stung by something.

\- You all right?

\- Yeah.

You guys just go ahead.

Better make sure it's not a tick.

Lyme's disease, you know.

Look, all right, there'll be three circles

around the bite if it's Lyme's disease.

But, like, you gotta watch out

because you could

just straight drop dead

from Lyme's disease.

Thanks, George.

Oh, if it is a tick and it gets dug in,

we might need to take my tweezers

and, like, put it under a flame

until it gets, like, red hot,

and then burn the thing to death

so it'll let go before we pull it out.

Can you leave us alone

for a second?

Thanks.

Seems like George is having

a good time.

What are you trying

to say, Clyde?

Fat boy's gonna get

what he's got coming.

I don't see a stinger.

Sam, what's going on here

with George?

Oh, it's nothing bad.

It's just a joke.

What kind of joke?

Well...

...we're planning on stripping him,

throwing him in the river,

and then we're gonna make him

run home naked.

\- We have a plan. It involves a dare.

\- A dare?

Yeah. See, the only reason

I didn't tell you before...

Who said I wanted to be

part of this?

All right, what about this?

What's that?

"If you could snap your fingers

right now,

"and he would drop dead

in his tracks, would you do it?"

\- It's totally mean, Sam.

\- He's mean.

He's a stupid fat kid.

He's got problems.

But he's obviously...

Promise me you won't

do anything to him.

It's not just me.

Promise, or I go back to the car.

All right, I promise.

I'll tell Rocky.

Can't wait to get her on the river

and start paddling.

\- Hey, Rock, you wanna go untie us?

\- Sure.

\- There any life jackets?

\- No, I don't think we'll need them.

Come on, sweetheart.

Gotta learn to live life on the edge.

He doesn't smoke, Marty.

Why don't you speak

for yourself, faggot?

I gotta keep my eye on you.

These are really strong.

Come on, Rock,

he's not such a bad guy.

He's acting like a nice guy, Sam.

In reality, he's not.

You a...

You a cigarette virgin, George?

No. No, I'm not, man.

I've smoked before.

I... No, I once cold smoked

an entire pack

of American Spirit Menthols.

\- Oh, yeah?

\- Yeah.

What if I told you American Spirit

doesn't make menthols?

They don't?

It's OK if you've never

smoked before, George. I never have.

Well, I have.

All right, I'm not lying.

You know, maybe they weren't

menthols, but they were definitely

\- American Spirits.

\- Right.

The only reason why

he's being nice to us

is because he sees this as

an opportunity to get something.

To get friends.

Everybody wants that.

OK, what if you were

his friend, Sam?

I mean, he'd still go around school,

beating everybody else up.

And that's actually

if you'd be his friend.

I don't care what you say.

I don't wanna do it.

\- Millie thinks it's a bad idea too.

\- Oh, well, if Millie thinks...

\- Millie thinks what's a bad idea?

\- Nothing.

You pansies untie the knot yet?

Chop, chop, come on.

Hey.

Hey, Rock, you know,

I got a knife

that'll slice through that

like butter.

That's OK, George.

I think we got it.

Well, it's got, like, a bone saw,

scissor, pick ax,

I mean, everything.

It's OK, George.

OK.

I'll talk to Marty about it, OK?

Give me your oar.

\- Nice.

\- Thank you, George.

Yeah, I once skipped

a rock on this lake,

it skipped, like,

a thousand times.

Let's get her in the water.

Aye, aye, capitan.

Calling off the plan.

I'll tell you later.

It's all taken care of.

Hey! You guys should take

your shoes off

if you don't want

to get them wet.

Too late. They're soaked.

This is gonna be fun,

don't you think?

Yeah. But whoever didn't

bring life jackets

on a boat trip's a moron.

Hey, you know

I have athlete's foot?

\- Get in.

\- You are so disgusting.

Oh, my gosh.

Row, two, three, four!

One, two, three, four...

Sam loves it, don't you lie

Rocky is a pimp

Clyde is a fag

Yeah, you love it, don't you?

He spit all over the lens.

Shut up, Rocky, this is

what's gonna get me on MTV.

You need go-go dancers.

This is expensive.

OK, now you have to stop.

Send your donations

to George Tooney, Oregon.

Love one.

I always thought I was really

talented in that sense.

You agree, right? Up top.

Maybe later.

I'm glad the way

this day's turning out.

It's a nice day.

Yeah, if nothing else,

it's a nice day.

Can you guys taste

how sweet the air is?

Smells like cherry blossom.

How do you know what

cherry blossoms smell like, George?

It's obvious.

I don't know.

What is a cherry blossom?

It's the blossom on a cherry.

No, I thought it was

its own kind of plant.

What do you think, Marty?

I think I'm bored as fuck.

I also think I got some more beer

in my pack.

\- Anyone want one?

\- Yeah.

\- You drinking, Sammy?

\- Yeah, sure.

I thought you...

Didn't you want a beer?

Hey, Sammy.

If you're really feeling

like a party animal...

...you wanna smoke

a birthday doobie?

Sam doesn't smoke weed, Marty.

\- Rocky, chill out.

\- There's younger people

\- on this trip, Marty.

\- All right, fuck-face, calm down.

\- I've been stoned before.

\- Oh, yeah?

Yeah. Yeah. I smoked a whole blunt

myself once. Yup.

I... I hallucinated that there was...

There was a little blue guy

on my shoulder,

fucking tap dancing.

But, no, I don't smoke weed

after that,

because, like, my doctor says

it stunts your growth.

\- So I'm waiting until I'm .

\- Yeah.

Because, you know, that's when

you stop growing.

Have you ever been stoned, Millie?

Would you please get that

out of my face?

All right, go ahead, turn it off.

Sure is a beautiful river.

Oh, you guys, look!

\- What?

\- What?

What?

I thought I saw a water snake.

Sam.

Millie.

Thanks.

\- Here.

\- Thanks.

All that boating really gets

your appetite up.

You've just been sitting in the boat.

I've been shifting my weight

the whole time,

trying to keep us level.

Yeah, you've really been

working hard.

As if your pussy ass

has been doing anything.

Did you make these yourself?

You'II... You'll have to give me

the recipe sometime.

It's peanut butter and jelly.

Oh, yeah.

Nothing beats a good piss

in the river.

Except, of course,

a good romping session

of a stupid, ugly, dumb,

pathetic piece of shit.

\- Yeah, we gotta talk about that.

\- Yeah?

What's to talk about?

I want to call it off.

I'm not laughing.

I'm dead serious.

Wait a minute.

First, you get me all juiced up.

You make me steal my mom's car.

You get me out here

on a Saturday

when I could be at home

watching TV.

\- Marty, come on.

\- Then you have me steering

the fucking Titanic all across the river

with a bunch of munchkins

who are totally sober

and bringing me down.

Now, you mean to tell me

we don't even get to do

what we came out here for?

I had no idea the guy

was gonna turn out so nice.

Check it out, Rock,

he's not nice!

He's a spoiled, retarded punk

who beat up your brother.

OK, maybe I feel a little sorry

for him now.

OK, well, then I'm gonna

give you two choices:

You're either hard as hell

and you're yanking my chain,

or you're the limpest dick

I've ever met in my life.

\- Everyone wants to call it off.

\- Well, everyone is a vagina!

You don't even have

a real grudge against him.

If you were any kind

of a good brother,

you wouldn't let Sammy boy

get the shit kicked out of him

and then stroke the beater-upper's dick

all day long.

\- Just remember the plan's off.

\- Yeah.

I just wonder if,

when push came to shove,

if you'd have my back.

Hey, Clyde.

Remember when you were in the

fourth grade, and I was in third, and I...

I smacked you across the face

with a bat?

\- How could I forget?

\- Maybe you had that thing

where you forget

from getting hit in the head.

\- Amnesia?

\- Yeah.

Anyway, I was trying to remember.

\- Why'd I do it?

\- I don't know.

You must've done something.

No, I never do anything to anybody.

That's stupid.

Of course you do.

Look, it's not stupid, George.

You just attacked me.

A kid doesn't just attack

for no reason.

You always attack for no reason.

I know it's your birthday, Sam,

but shut your trap.

Hey! You pussies done

with your sammies?

Does it look like we're done

with our sandwiches?

Yeah, I'm gonna get the boat

back in the water.

You ladies can join me

whenever you want.

Why'd you drop the anchor?

Because I felt like it.

Hey, Sammy.

What you say we bust out

that Stream Machine.

\- Yeah, OK.

\- Clyde, can you give it to me?

All right.

Put that away.

All right, first, we must charge

the propulsion system.

And then take aim

and run a preliminary test.

Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire!

Don't fucking squirt

that thing at me again!

Hey, what do you guys say

we play some Truth or Dare?

Yeah. Yeah, I love that game.

\- OK, then, let's do it.

\- Let's not.

People's feelings always end up hurt

when we play this game.

Yeah, she's right.

God, Sam and Millie

are a couple of little

wet pussies, aren't they?

Clyde, do you wanna start?

I don't know. I'm kind of with

Millie and Sam on this one.

Pussy number one,

pussy number two,

pussy number three.

Go ahead, Clyde. Start the game.

OK, then.

Rocky, truth or dare?

Truth.

All right, I want you to tell us,

in words or more,

what you were thinking

the last time you beat off.

Susie Johnson.

But that's...

That's not even words.

It's, like, two.

OK, I imagined that

she followed me into the locker room,

went into the stall.

She got on her knees.

I sat on the toilet.

\- That's .

\- All right, Rocky, it's your turn.

OK, Sammy. Truth or dare?

Dare.

I dare you to French kiss

Millie for ten seconds.

Man.

It's pretty exciting.

\- It's OK.

\- What? It's OK.

Wait, did you hear that?

It's OK.

She wants it.

This is what I paid for? Come on!

\- Come on!

\- Let's go!

I want my money back.

OK. There you go.

There you go! Ten.

Nine,

eight, seven,

six, five,

four, three,

two...

Oh, shit. Oh, man.

Yo, Rock. Rock, I just had

an amazing flash

of what your brother and Millie would

look like all hot and bothered in bed.

\- That's gross.

\- Sammy, go. It's your turn.

Wait, wait, maybe... Maybe we

shouldn't call him Sammy anymore.

Maybe we should call him

"lover boy."

OK, then.

Marty.

\- Truth or dare?

\- Dare.

All right.

I dare you to pull down

your pants and your underwear,

and show us that famous dick of yours

for at least ten seconds.

Ten seconds.

Wow, you are a killer, Sam.

All right, I will do it,

because I am proud of my boys.

But if I do,

I don't want anyone else

wimping out on their dares.

So let's see the penis.

\- Bring on the penis!

\- All right.

Millie, close your eyes.

Marty doesn't want to go to jail.

No cameras.

We ready?

That's sick.

\- Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire!

\- Oh! OK. OK.

All right.

You fucking asshole.

\- It was hairy as a chimp!

\- Yeah, was it?

Oh, shit! Oh, shit!

It looked like a giant frog.

All right, assholes.

That was pretty funny, douche bag.

\- At first I thought it was all deformed,

\- Thank you.

\- Because it was just so fucking ugly.

\- OK. All right.

Have you gotten out

all your stupid chuckles yet?

Have I gotten out all

my stupid chuckles? No!

All right. Well, whenever you're done,

let me know, because it's my turn next.

"Whenever you're done, let me know,

because it's my turn next."

\- What are you doing?

\- Yeah, well, what are you doing?

\- Stop imitating me.

\- "Stop imitating me."

\- Enough is enough!

\- "Enough is enough!"

Is that what your dad says to you?

You don't know shit about my father.

If you ever say anything

about my father again, I will kill you.

Do you understand?

Marty, I...

I was just messing around with you.

OK, messing boy.

I dare you to strip butt naked

and jump in the river.

Marty, leave him alone.

I did my dare.

Now he does his.

Those are the rules, Clyde.

Marty, why don't you

just calm down?

\- OK, the game's over.

\- The game'll be over in a minute!

Right after fat-ass here takes

his clothes off and gets in the bath.

Chill out, Marty, all right?

Because you know what?

I didn't even pick dare, all right?

I pick truth.

You want a truth?

OK, I'll give you a truth.

The truth is, lard-fart,

is that we didn't invite you out here

because we've been secretly in love

\- with you all these years.

\- Marty, don't do this.

We invited you out here

because you smacked Sammy boy

\- right there in the cranium.

\- Marty, stop.

So we came up with a plan

to mess you up.

Is that true, Sam?

Yeah.

But then we changed our minds

because we liked you.

Wait, you...? You tricked me?

Yes, we tricked you.

And, yes, all these suckers here

changed their minds,

but I didn't change mine.

I'm a man who likes to

follow through with his plans.

What have you been planning?

We were planning

on stripping you,

throwing you in the river,

then making you run home naked.

\- It's not funny.

\- Oh, it's super-duper funny to me.

\- I'm sorry, George.

\- You're not sorry!

I'm sorry.

Is...? Is it even your birthday?

No.

You're a fucking lying

son of a bitch, Sam!

All right? And I hope you

fucking go to hell!

\- Don't make things worse, George.

\- Shut the fuck up, Millie.

You fucking stupid JAP cunt!

Sit down, George.

You're out of control.

Shut the fuck up, Clyde!

You faggot!

Fucking skinny,

butt-munching faggot!

I hate you, you know that?

I really do!

Because all you do is

fucking prance around school,

talking about your fucking

faggoty, fairy fathers!

I'll tell you what!

I don't want to hear

about your fucking fathers

and how their assholes work.

All right? It makes me sick!

And I... I fucking hope they

fucking die of fag disease!

Yeah!

And... And speaking

of dead fathers...

...I just remembered

why bonehead, white-trash,

fucking donkey-dick Marty

got so fucking freaked

when I started talking

about his daddy.

His Neanderthal

drunk dad put a gun in his mouth

and splattered his brains

all over the wall.

You know, I almost forgot

that my mom told me that.

She said, "His daddy splattered

his brains all over the wall."

I thought it was sad at first.

But, now, I like it.

His daddy splattered

his brains

all over the wall.

\- His daddy splattered his brains

\- Shut up, George.

\- All over the wall.

\- George, come on. Shut up.

His daddy splattered his brains

all over the wall!

\- Stop it, George!

\- All over the wall!

\- His daddy splattered his brains

\- No one talks to people like that.

\- All over the wall!

\- Shut the fuck up, George!

\- Shut the fuck up!

\- All over the wall!

All over the wall!

His daddy splattered his brains

\- Shut up!

\- All over the wall!

\- Marty!

\- Stop it!

\- Marty! George!

\- All over the wall!

Shut the fuck up!

\- Help! Help!

\- That's what happens

when you fuck with Martini Blank!

\- Help, help! Please!

\- Martini Blank's friends back him up.

\- That's what friends do, fuck-o.

\- Help!

\- Help! Help! Help!

\- That's why you're in the water.

\- Because you've got none.

\- Help! Fucker!

Help!

Help! Help!

Help! Help!

Please help.

Shit, you guys,

he's not coming up!

Help!

Guys, help, now! Hurry!

Get him up.

George.

\- Oh, shit.

\- Do you know what you're doing?

One, two, three, four...

Help!

Help!

Help!

Can anyone help us?

\- Help!

\- One, two, three, four.

One, two, three, four.

Come on.

Wake up. Come on, wake up!

Wake up.

Shit.

Wake up!

Wake up!

Wake up! God, wake up!

Wake up, wake up, wake up!

Wake up, wake up!

Wake up! Wake up,

wake up, wake up!

Wake up!

Fuck you! Fuck you!

Fuck you!

We can never be forgiven

for what we did.

You didn't do anything.

I don't wanna be here.

I don't wanna be here.

I wanted to kill him before

I threw him over. Now he's dead.

Maybe this was his time to go.

Maybe it was his fate.

Why would it be his fate?

Because everything happens

for a reason, Rock.

I don't know.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.

Anybody know what time it is?

What if we say

we were playing Truth or Dare,

and then we dared him

to jump into the river,

and he did, and he drowned.

What the hell are you doing?

Looking for his fucking

video camera.

If it gets found, then everybody

finds out what we did.

Everyone's gonna find out

what we did,

regardless if the video camera

gets found, Marty.

Not if we don't want them to.

Are you joking?

Look, this was a prank that went

wrong. We come completely clean.

No one's got a ton of sympathy

for guys who throw fat kids in the river.

All right? If we turn ourselves in,

we're all screwed.

What do you think's

gonna happen, Marty?

Superman's gonna fly around

Earth and turn back time?

No. I don't think Superman's

going to turn back time.

Think we gotta bury the body.

Rocky, if we bury the body, it's gonna

look like we did it on purpose.

If we bury the body,

we're not gonna look like anything.

Out of sight, out of mind.

Yeah, well, maybe out of your mind,

you stupid fuck.

Look, we just committed

a major fucking crime.

And if any one of us cracks,

we are all gonna be screwed.

Look, it was an accident. Kids like us

have accidents all the time.

This wasn't just an accident.

All right? We schemed this,

from the beginning.

All right, so fine, we schemed.

No one has to know that.

They're gonna figure it out.

Somebody's bound to crack when

they start asking a million questions.

Put Sammy boy in a lie detector.

Look, the idea

of burying the body is nuts.

Going to jail

and getting raped every night

for the rest of your cute,

little, fucking lives is nuts.

I think you're nuts.

So that's it?

We're just gonna pretend

like we're all innocent.

\- Shut up.

\- No.

\- Shut up.

\- No!

If you've got a better idea,

then you better spit it out

\- because no one else does.

\- Marty, come on.

\- Do you have one?

\- Shit, Marty. Get off. Come on.

If you've got a better idea,

I'll listen. Do you?

\- No.

\- Then do you agree

that we have to go

with the best idea we've got?

Yes. Get off.

You always gotta go

with the best idea you've got.

Otherwise you're just left

laying around

not knowing what to do.

I can't do it.

It's not safe.

It's a big joke anyway.

I think that's deep enough.

Hey, you guys wanna help?

First thing we gotta do

when we get back

is deal with Jasper

and my brother.

How?

Gotta make sure they forget

they ever saw George with us.

What the fuck

you gonna do? Huh?

Hit them over the head with a rock,

hope they get amnesia?

Thanks.

All right, this is the way

it's gonna work.

We drop everybody off

at their houses.

Everybody's gonna sit tight

until I go make sure

everything's "copathetic"

with Kile and Jasper.

The word's copacetic, Marty.

Yeah.

Millie...

...mum's the word.

Peg, can I get the phone?

Shit.

\- Kile?

\- Hey, Marty.

\- What's cooking?

\- Hey, you little fucker.

How'd the cow spanking go?

What?

Looks fantastic.

You OK?

You look a little...

No, I'm fine.

Clyde, if something's up,

it's OK to tell us about it.

This is so fucked.

Fuck!

I don't even know...

I don't even know.

Hey.

Maybe you guys

could take me home?

Wish we knew what to do.

We know what to do.

You know what we did, Rocky.

What are you trying to say, Sam?

You have to trust me

on this one, Sam.

I'm your big brother.

But I don't trust you.

Where you going?

What do you want?

To talk.

We have nothing to talk about.

It was your guys' plan.

I was just there.

That doesn't mean

I have to tell on you.

And that's your problem.

Are you done?

Can I come in?

Do you remember when you said

we could never be forgiven?

That might be right.

I don't know.

The only thing I do know is that

I'm not sure about anything.

What do you want us to do?

Go back and unbury the body?

He's dead.

You know...

...when we graduate

high school

and go to college and become doctors

and lawyers and all that...

...what do you think it'd be like?

\- Hey.

\- Hey, Marty.

\- Good to see you.

\- How you doing, Mr. Maris?

\- How are you?

\- I'm good.

Are...?

Is Rocky and Sam home?

Oh, yeah, yeah.

The whole gang's here.

They're listening to music

in the bedroom there.

\- Do you mind if...? Thanks.

\- Yeah, yeah.

What's going on here?

Why don't you sit down?

What, so I go off to make sure

all our business is taken care of,

and all of a sudden

you guys form a new club?

\- We've come to a decision.

\- You've come to a decision?

What, are you kidding me?

We already decided.

I talked to Jasper and Kile.

They're not gonna say anything.

Everything is going to be OK.

No. Everything is not

gonna be OK.

So, what?

All you guys decide to squeal

or something?

We have to, Marty.

It's the only way...

No, there is no "only way", Sam.

That's crap.

OK? You know that's crap.

All right.

Screw all of you, then.

\- Marty, hang on.

\- No!

\- Where you going?

\- Away from you.

You suck.

You know that, right?

\- What are you gonna do?

\- I don't know, drive to Mexico.

What do you think?

I don't know what to think.

Well, if you don't know

what to think,

then you probably shouldn't

be making decisions.

What do you think about

letting me borrow your gun?

\- Hey.

\- Yeah.

Easy, man.

He was saying terrible things.

Things that shouldn't

have been said.

When your brother

knocked George overboard...

...would you say he was

in control

or out of control?

\- You got something for me?

\- Yeah.

Excuse me, Sam.

Never seen him

more out of control in my life.

My name is George.

And this...

...is the inside of my mind.

The inside of my mind

has a zillion things.

The inside of my mind

has a zillion things about it.

But...

...people that don't

see inside my mind

don't know there are

a zillion things and...

You know, since no one

sees inside my mind,

no one really knows.

But...

...one day people will know.

One day people will know

because that's my master plan.

To film it all.

To document every aspect

of the life that is me.

And put it in a time capsule

in my back yard.

And so that one day, some...

...alien,

or some highly evolved species,

will find it and...

understand./pre 


End file.
